IAN REED - Guitar, Vocals, Füntperson

A man. A vision. From his humble beginnings as a baby, Ian Reed took the world by storm when he became the youngest man ever to attain the title of Infant Chef Squad Captain. When he isn't playing guitar, Reed enjoys long candles on the beach and a nice game of Tunklepuck.

Likes: Fried chicken, mysteries, being loud, the drinking

Dislikes: The movie "Seven Psycopaths", the singer from Actionesse

Spirit animal: Harpsichord

Nickname: Beens (pronounced "beans")

Favorite Toy: Shrinky-Dinks


PADDY MORAN - Bass, Vocals, Bid'ness

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush; and boy, does Paddy Moran have birds in spades. No stranger to the ol' runaround, Moran found an Actionesse album in the garbage, gave it a spin, and had the one thought that brought the band to where they are today: "I could exploit these guys."

Likes: Fruit snack, snack fruit, when a dog has their day

Dislikes: Eggs, self-esteem, avocado, bitter defeat at the hands of the one whom you know you've wronged

Spirit Animal: The Phone

Nickname: Smatchymo The Trumpeteer

Favorite Toy: Action Hank's 3-in-1 Command Center with Ops Vehicle

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PHIL KALTENBACH - Guitar, Vocals, Poster Boy

A quiet man once said nothing at all cause he's pretty quiet, but if you could read his mind you should try to use your powers for good. There once was a short skronny child, and one day, he blossomed into an awkward skinny quiet man with childlike tendencies. This man stumbled into a room, with a well practiced four piece band, mistakenly to find he was exactly where he needed to be. After great interrogation he lied and said he played music. No one seems to notice that he's not ever at practice, yet photographed at every show.

Likes: Puppies, terrible old folk music, yelling at the youth

Dislikes: Computers, spiders, rude

Spirit Animal: Woody Guthrie

Nickname: Giggles McGigglepuss

Favorite Toy: Folding Chairs

JOEL KENWORTHY - Horns, Flute, Vocals, The Nitty Gritty

Fueled by a potent regimen of alcohol, caffeine, and tobacco, Joel Kenworthy scrambles through Seattle's boroughs like a scalded otter, ever rushing to another gig with sax and booze strapped to his person. Exactly how many bands he holds membership with at a given moment fluctuates wildly, but for as many projects he's lent his lips to, his heart belongs with Actionesse.

Likes: HONK!ing, beer, bikes

Dislikes: Sleeping, Waiting

Spirit Animal: Bender Rodriguez, when he has a stadium air horn installed on his face

Nickname: Holio, Koopacat, or Unkle Fugly

Favorite Toy: Bead Tail

JIMMY COLVEN - Drums, Mass Appeal

Born with a ravenous thirst for adventure and 1% milk, Jimmy discovered early in life that with the heart of a lion comes a lifetime ban from the Woodland Park Zoo. After some decades of mediocre origin narrative, it was through confused happenstance and grudging acceptance that Jimmy joined what would become Actionesse, after the previous iteration of the band's drummer died or something. When he isn't hidden behind the many bum-bums of his bandmates while on stage, Jimmy can be found walking around Seattle with various instruments strapped to his body or quietly unraveling in his apartment with his two cats.

Likes: A pleasant chill, the waft of the freshly ground bean

Dislikes: Scorpions that also look like spiders, congealed skin flakes in the grooves on the controller

Spirit Animal: Siamang

Nickname: Jimbo, Jims, Smames, Jimmalimmadingdong

Favorite Toy: Stomp Rockets